A New Year resolution for you to keep!

New Year's tends to be the time people make resolutions for the year ahead. Most of them are ones that are never stuck to.

This year I want you all to make one that you will keep. Check yourselves!

Any changes should be checked by your doctor, and don't be too embarrassed to go, they've seen it all before! Early detection increases survival and reduces the amount of treatment needed. Most importantly it could save your life, it's certainly saved mine.

It's so easy, once a month... That's only 12 times in a year! Easy peasy resolution!

http://www.breakthrough.org.uk/sites/default/files/media/About%20Breast%20Cancer/Breast%20cancer%20publications/Touch%20Look%20Check%20leaflet,%20Edition%202_0.pdf

So check, check, check!!!!

Happy New Year! Make 2014 a fabulous one! Xxx

Radiotherapy planning

Christmas eve afternoon involved a trip out to the hospital where I will be having radiotherapy.

It was a really simple appointment, few quick questions then I led on a special table with an arm slot above my head. They drew some crosses on my chest in marker pen, took a few measurements and did a CT scan in the position I was led in. The center of two crosses were marked with a permanent tattoo so i can be lined up for each radiotherapy session. I have one between my breast's, nicely hidden in my cleavage and one under my arm at the same level. Pretty sure given a couple of years I will momentarily forget what they are and mistake them for blackheads, they are that small.

It sounds like each session I will lie on a replica of that table, be lined up with the measurements and my tattoos then have the radiation fired at me.

Bit nervous about taking the first step on the next big part of my journey but also looking forward to getting it over and done with.

Very happy Christmas news!

Went to see my surgeon and breast care nurse today. The pathology report shows no cancerous or pre-cancerous (DCIS) cells, just fat necrosis, which is basically dead cells from my WLE operation. Amazing news!

My boob was also quite swollen and sore, they took the stitch out which stung a little, and he had a good feel, turns out I had a seroma (collection of fluid). So he stuck a huge needle in and syringed 200mls off! Needless to say it now feels much more comfortable despite stinging!

I have also started my course of tamoxifen, which in a strange way is rather scary. This is the tablet I will be taking every single day for the next 10 years of my life. The benefits of it are huge, but the possible side effects also sound horrible. It will put me into a very early menopause so I mainly have hot flushes and mood swings to look forward to. Heres hoping that's all the side effects I get though! I also need to be careful what other medicines I take alongside tamoxifen as they can decrease its effectiveness, which I don't want to do. I currently have labyrinthitis (viral inner ear infection) so I'm currently on tablets to stop me wobbling and going dizzy whilst my body fights it, luckily I am allowed both these together.

All in all it's blooming good news, and just in time for Christmas! Hopefully the only wobbling I will be doing now is from the alcohol Christmas celebrations! Have a good one folks. Xx

Cavity shave operation and results!

Last Monday I had a cavity shave operation. They basically went back in the incision from my wide local excision and took a bit more tissue out. If this wasn't enough I would need a mastectomy, the thought of which terrifies me.

The operation went well and I went home the same day. Had a lot of pain to start with that painkillers didn't touch the pain. I managed about 10 minutes sleep at the start of the night then woke up with no pain. Looked at my dressing and it was saturated in blood. After a little panic and a phonecall to the out of hours nurse I changed my dressing, put a pressure dressing on and went back to bed. Me and the nurse think I may have had a collection of blood that just needed to find a way out.

Since then it seems to be healing well and I have minimal pain.

Today my fabulous, fabulous surgeon phoned me personally to let me know that the results have come back and they're good! Which means no mastectomy!!! He is going to discuss them more with me on Monday when I have my stitch out, but it is fabulous news!

This also means I am now classed as having NED! Which means no evidence of disease! Which is as close to the stereotypical "all clear" that I will ever get!

Fabulous results in perfect time for Christmas! Xx

Radiotherapy, tamoxifen and a good few tears.

On Tuesday I had a meeting with one of my oncologist's, this was primarily to discuss plans for radiotherapy.

The plan as far as I understand it is that I will have my next planning appointment in the next 30 days and start at some point in January. This planning appointment means a CT scan and maybe some x-rays, then I will have three permanent tattoo's. These will be about the size of a biro dot so not noticeable (I hope), they are used to make sure the radiotherapy is fired exactly at the right point, therefore preventing too much damage to healthy cells.

I will have 15 session's and possibly 5 extra booster sessions. This is every weekday for 3-4 weeks, about 30-40 miles from home as the equipment is stupidly expensive so only bigger hospital's have them.

The main side effects are tiredness due to the body having to repair damaged healthy cells, and redness/ peeling/ soreness/ breaking down of the skin. To prevent this I need to use E45 religiously, use baby soap, avoid deodorant and avoid shaving under that arm (eww!). These side effects will continue to peak about 10-15 days after treatment I am told.

All in all sounds pretty straight forward! Looking forward to getting that stage out the way!

We also discussed the herceptin I am having as I am having a couple of side effects. Not much I can do about that other than painkiller's and antihistamine's, something to do with how the antibodies are broken down.

I asked about my chances of survival and the scary chances of reoccurrence and both seem extremely positive numbers! They have a magic computer system that when they put tumour statistics in it spits out some figures. With all the treatment they suggest, I have about a 98% chance of being alive in 10 years!!! Woop to me! Computer system seemed to think it was more likely something else would get me! Chances of it never coming back were also about as high (I forget the number as there were so many figures). I am bloody lucky! I know there are no guarantees, these figures are just a guide, but they seem hugely positive!

The first thing we spoke about in this appointment however was hormone therapy. As the cancer cell's I had fed on my oestrogen and progesterone the best way to help prevent another tumour is to cut these off, therefore forcing me into an early menopause! (Cue the mood swing's and hot flushes). I have to start these in 2-3 week's and carry that on for a whole 10 years! If these do not successfully put me into the menopause then I will need an injection of an implant as well (I think this is every three months) to again cut my hormones further.

The reason I have taken a few day's to write this and have left it till last is because it has taken a few days for me to get my head around. He threw out the sentence "to kill your ovaries off", this sent me into a huge spiral and resulted in me sobbing for a good hour there and another hour when I got home. I managed to ask him what he meant, and as they are putting me into an early menopause there is no guarantee that my body will crawl back out of that. He also said that my consultant oncologist and fertility consultant were wrong in saying I can stop this after 2 years to try for a baby and then continue the rest of the course after I give birth.

As you can imagine at 24 this was a massive blow, and for the first time in all this shit I said to a doctor that I didn't want the treatment. Looking back I feel stupid and cross at myself for saying this, and I didn't mean it, my health at the end of the day is too important, and there are other ways of having a family. I still took the prescription though.

I do however feel he forgot how young I was, as he looked back through my notes and commented on my age, then said under 30 you have a 70-80% chance of fertility returning (which is a huge chance to me). I suppose after dealing with the regular older population with breast cancer it is difficult to remember I am over half the age of the rest of them. I have been naughty and have done lots of googling, thanks to my nursey side I have only looked at evidential and reliable information and avoided those scare articles. Everything seems to be positive, I have age on my side. The group I am part of on Facebook have also been very positive, I trust them. Turn's out both drugs are used to try and help treat infertility too... So I have taken a few days to try and brush off the "kill your ovaries" comment and get back onto my positive track!

Which is good timing, christmas do with my beautiful work friend's tonight!! I'm ready to make it a good one and celebrate the 98% chance of being alive in 10 years! I'll drink to that! Xx